406. I Don’t Like Babies

Parenting is a lifelong process, so if you find yourself not loving a certain, that’s ok! Today, Jo Piazza gives you the parenting pep talk you might need.

Jo Piazza is an author, podcaster and journalist. Her latest book, The Sicilian Inheritance, is on sale now and it’s SO good!! Jo also hosts the podcast Under The Influence, about social media marketing and how we all interact with it.

Transcripts may not appear in their final version and are subject to change.

Jo Piazza:   I’m Jo Piazza and it’s going to be okay.  Pretty soon my youngest baby is not gonna be a baby anymore.  She’s about to turn two years old. She is a headstrong, smart, funny, ridiculous toddler, and I adore her. And she’s also the last baby that we’re going to have. My husband has been, has been fixed. We’ve taken, taken care of the situation.

And also, you know, we’re older people. I’m in my mid 40s. He’s 50. We’re done. We’re done. We’re not done. doing this again.  And I feel really good about that because I love my children. I do. I love them. But I want to admit something to you. Something that I think a lot of people might need to hear because we don’t really hear it.

Hear it enough.  I don’t like babies. I do not like the newborn phase. Teeny, tiny, helpless, squirmy babies. I mean, it’s not like I want to abandon them to a remote mountainside only to return on their first birthdays. I mean, I would if it were socially acceptable. I just prefer older kids. I like a sturdy kid.

I like one that I can hold on to, who holds on to me, who’s not gonna fall off my body if I sneeze.  And I think it’s okay to say that out loud. I think it’s okay to say, I want to put my kid on the ground and use the toilet. I like being able to put food on the table in front of them and let them scoop it into their mouths themselves.

I like walkers and talkers and gigglers.  For so long, I’ve been I feel like women have been told, you are gonna love that baby the second that it comes out of your body.  And I did. I loved, I loved them plenty. I just didn’t like them a lot of the time.  And I know that toddlers climb on things and they’re just, they’re constantly trying, trying to fall off things after they climb them.

But look, I will take that to a floppy necked, freshy baby any day.  Babies, especially the first time that you have them, are total little aliens. They don’t make any sense. Even with my third child, I was confused most of the time. Most of the time.  So I am here to say it out loud.  And proud. Proud, actually. I don’t like babies.

I don’t like babies. I know a lot of people do, and that is nice for them, but I don’t. And I just want to tell you that it’s okay if you don’t like your baby. that much. We can have a wide variety of feelings on the spectrum of motherhood and being a mom, being a parent, being a caregiver is long. It is a long life and we don’t need to adore every single second.

There are seasons and there are stages and you can love some and you can hate some and that’s okay because you’re going to be doing this for the rest of your life.  However you are parenting,  whether or not you are liking it right now.  You’re the best parent for your kid.  You’re doing a great job.